3-Year Old + Cupcakes = Chocolate Explosion

Today's lesson: I suck at making cupcakes. The only person who sucks worse than me at making cupcakes is my 3-year old daughter. We made cupcakes together.

What did I learn?

• Don't put the first dozen cupcakes in the oven before pouring the second dozen. All that left over batter was supposed to go in the first batch. Congratulations, we now have baby cakes.
• Timers. Timers are nice for timing how long the cupcakes have been in the oven. I should remember that for next time.
• When I put the cooling racks on the counter I really should push them back out of my daughter's reach. Especially when they have cupcakes on 'em.
• When I ask my daughter to help me frost, I should be more specific about the frosting to cupcake ratio. We got either a little frosting with the cupcake or a little cupcake with the frosting.
• According to the kid, when she's done licking the whisk, it goes back in drawer with all the clean dishes.
  

"Knowing is half the battle." - G.I. Joe

No Nap Kids + Restaurant = YOU SHOULD'VE KNOWN BETTER STUPID!

This lesson: After quite a few successful outings with both of my kids (well, successful on their part, other people tried to ruin them, just not my kids), they were finally "those kids" at a restaurant yesterday.

What did I learn?

• A good server can sense when drinks get spilled and magically appear with new drinks and lots of towels. Thanks Ariel!

• Sometimes, when the drinks get spilled, it's Dada's fault. Sorry I blamed it on you ScapeGoatGirl.

• My son likes cheese ravioli. Just not enough to stop him from screeching like a spider monkey on crack.

• A plastic straw can stab through Styrofoam, thus leaking chocolate milk all over the table. This time it was your fault, ScapeGoatGirl.

• It only takes 5 seconds for a good server to sense that things have gone from bad to worse at your table and to stop by with an offer -- that I'm sure also doubled as a demand from the kitchen staff (we were seated right next to the open kitchen) -- to box the food up so we could get the hell out. Again, thanks Ariel. I hope my husband tipped you well.
  

"Knowing is half the battle." - G.I. Joe

My Brain - 1 Week Of Sleep = IQ of 7

The Lesson: I wish I knew. After a week of tending to sick vampire kids and working, I have the mental capacity of a barnacle.

What did I learn?

• After you turn 30, falling asleep on the couch costs you the use of one of your body parts. The couch will exact it's preferred toll. Last night, it wanted my left shoulder.


• The more tired I am, the worse I dress. I walked out the door this morning in beige slacks that are 2 sizes too big, and low-cut black baby doll style shirt that is described on the tag as being 100% modal. Whatever the hell that is. Oh yeah, then stick a lime green lycra-spandex cami under the shirt. You're visualizing..... you're visualizing..... you're visualizing...... and......you're barfing.


• You know you're getting desperate when you have to drink an Amp at 10:00 at night in order to ensure that you're able to stay awake until your 10 month old finally falls asleep. Just for the record, I fell asleep at midnight. Not for long, but I did sleep.


• When it takes you more than 10 seconds to remember what your first name is, you should probably call in sick.


• http://www.papajohns.com/ is the best dinner you'll never cook (or leave your house for).

"Knowing is half the battle." - G.I. Joe