Merry Grinchmas!

Santa brought many wonderful presents to the AwesomeHouse this year.  Then The Grinch had to show up bearing gifts.  What did he bring this year?

• For the girl: A fever of 104.
• For the boy: Sore throat, diarrhea and severe diaper rash.
• For Mr. A: A trip to Walgreens because some asshole, who will remain nameless (Grandma), didn't bother to call us while we were out yesterday to tell us we were out of milk.
• For me (and then subsequently everyone else): A dozen rotten eggs.  I just bought those fucking things last week.  No deviled eggs this year.

"Knowing is half the battle." - G.I. Joe

After The Warranty

I've spent my vacation watching everything in the house fall apart around me.

• My TV.  We bought it 7 years ago.  For the last 2 years, it's been acting up a little.  There have been times when there were red spots coming out the right side of the screen.  That was easy to ignore.  Then on Tuesday the screen went dark.  Not all the way black, just dark.  Ugh.  This is where I find out that all of my shows are shot in dim lighting.  Time for a new TV.
  
• My dryer.  It came free with the house.  We didn't have a particular attachment to it. It dries our clothes.  Until it doesn't.  There are some loads now that have to go through the thing 2 or 3 times.  This is one that we're going to ride out until the thing finally dies.  I am not looking forward to replacing it.  Every woman knows (and Mr. A is about to find out) that you don't replace just the washer or just the dryer.  You get them as a set so they match.  Yes, it is important.  Your laundry comes out mutated when your washer and dryer don't match.
• My vacuum.  This one pisses me off because I just bought the thing.  I tried cleaning my dining room rug last night and the damn thing just sucked up all the dirt, then spit it back onto the floor next to the rug.  Lame!  We cleaned all the filters this morning in hopes that it was just being pissy because it was full of crap. We'll see.
• My microwave.  It took me 2 minutes to nuke something that the instructions say should only take --at max-- 55 seconds.  If we have to replace the microwave, it will be the 3rd one we've had in the last 5 years.  Contrary to what that statement would imply, we don't actually do a hell of a lot of cooking in the thing.  We mostly use it to heat crap up or reheat leftovers.  I'm seriously thinking of not replacing the stupid thing.
  

 Of course, all this crap is breaking down right before Christmas, but right after we've already spent some good money on gifts.  Gifts that can't be taken back, naturally. 

"Knowing is half the battle." - G.I. Joe

Today's Horoscope

1. 
   

   Taurus (4/20-5/20)

   You're the master of ceremonies. You're a fountain of cheerfulness. You're slated to have big fun no matter what you end up doing with yourself. Since you probably went over all the possibilities in your last slow moment, you're ready to move as soon as the mood hits you. Maybe you're up for a fresh attack on a project that once defeated you. Maybe you'll paint bright colors all over something that usually bores you to tears. Whatever you do, do it with gusto.
   

 Dead on, horoscope.  Dead on.  What did I do today?

• Slept until 9:15.
• Turned on my fountain.
• Built houses in Sims 3.
• Washed some of the kids' clothes.
• Checked my email.

But I did do it all with gusto.

"Knowing is half the battle." - G.I. Joe